Binge.
That word is associated with shame, embarrassment, disorder, and guilt for me.
It’s actually a diagnosable type of eating disorder, now, which hasn’t always been the case. Bingeing is (very loosely) when you overeat but do not purge afterward.
As I work through my emotional eating, I’ve been steering clear of the word binge. It just seems too drastic – something that only very sick, very overweight people do. (Which is totally wrong and rude, but I think often the stigma.) Not something that I, a functioning, fit, thin person does. What I was doing was just emotional eating. Just eating too much sometimes.
The medical definition of binge eating disorder (from MayoClinic) is:
“Frequently consuming unusually large amounts of food…becoming a regular occurrence, usually done in secret. You feel such a compulsion that you can’t resist the urges and continue binge eating.”
I sometimes see myself falling into that definition, but the other night, Geneen Roth rocked my world. In her book, Breaking Free from Emotional Eating, she calls for a different definition of binge. One that most certainly includes me:
“Bingeing does not necessarily mean standing in front of the refrigerator with one hand in a pot of vegetables and the other in a box of cookies. Bingeing is an attitude; bingeing is qualitative. Bingeing is not only the act of eating and its concomitant feelings but all the moments, decisions, and feelings that lead up to that act. Bingeing is a symptom…”
It made perfect sense. Just because I wasn’t scarfing down the exact definition of an “unusually large amount of food” does meant I wasn’t bingeing. I still had that mindset – the mindset that something was bothering me, some emotion or situation, and I was going to solve it with food. I had an urgent need for food and I wasn’t in control of it. I wasn’t hungry, but I was going to eat. And I would prefer that no one know about it.
Geneen goes on to say,
“Now it [only] takes my awareness of the urgency with which I need food – any food and any quantity of food – for me to classify the act as a binge. Two cookies can be a binge.”
TWO COOKIES? That is not a binge, that’s dessert!
It depends on the mindset. If you are eating two cookies because they sound good and you’d like dessert, then it’s dessert. But if you are eating two cookies because there is some emotion or situation causing you to NEED the cookies so much so that you eat them without even enjoying them, without even being hungry for them, then it is a binge.
An example:
I had had dinner (and dessert, actually) one night and then got into an argument on the phone. I was so upset. So frustrated. I actually ended up stopping the conversation becuase I knew I needed time away to think. But the first thing I did? I went and got two bowls of chocolate chips and habitually put them in my mouth – bowl to mouth, bowl to mouth – without even tasting them.
Two little bowls wouldn’t normally constitute a binge, but the behavior was definitely binge-like. I was hurt and angry, not hungry and craving chocolate. At that point, the food was a need that I felt powerless too.
I thought that food would soothe me.
Spoiler: it didn’t. When I continued that conversation (and eventually worked it out) later that night, and I was still upset. Still upset, but also ashamed and guilt-ridden over the chocolate chips I ate.
Lose/Lose.
This new awareness of a binge as an attitude is illuminating. It doesn’t change anything that has happened, but it makes me more aware of what is going on. It makes me realize that when I emotionally eat, what I usually need is some sort of comfort.
Geneen Roth says,
“We all need plunges into oblivion. Sometimes living is too much to handle…Eating is a socially acceptable way of taking time for ourselves. All else is defined as indulgence. Or selfish or unnecessary or a waste of time.”
She suggests finding what a “plunge into oblivion” is for you, and doing it every day for 15 minutes. It might be a bubble bath, a trashy magazine, or a nap. By doing it every day, we are taking care of ourselves AND teaching ourselves what we can do when we get into an uncomfortable or upsetting situation.
Bingeing isn’t a lack of willpower, it is a symptom.
From now on, I will try to think of other ways to react to whatever is causing that symptom.
- What do you think about this new definition of a binge?
- What do you think about the idea of food being an acceptable way of taking time for ourselves, when all other things are thought of as an indulgence?
When we talk about eating disorders in my Psych class one of the first things I’ll ask my students is “How many of you have totally binged on a food item before?” Most will raise their hands.
Then we talk about what binging really is, how MUCH it really is, and all of the negative emotional/physical consequences of it.
I’m fairly confident most will stop using that phrase after they know what it really means!
Some days I get so hungry that I really overeat – an amount that would be considered a binge. If I’m eating at a normal pace an stopping when I’m full, I don’t consider it a binge. But when it’s the frenzied, fast eating of the same copious amounts of food (or more) and ends up with a stomachache, I suppose it is a binge. Like you, I didn’t think that ‘binging’ could apply to me – but it has lately. Thanks for making me be more aware!
There is a huge difference between overeating and bingeing and most people don’t understand it. I’m glad you made the distinction here because you’re right. A binge is connected to the feelings that go with it. Once you recognize this it will help you to figure out where to go from there!
“It just seems too drastic – something that only crazy, obese people do.”
Clare, you should really think about rewording this sentence-I’m not sure you realize how offensive that is! Not only the remark about obese people, but as someone who is wanting to become a doctor, you should know how offensive and not PC it is to use “crazy” as a derogatory term.
Hey! I was saying as something clearing wrong…noting that my mindset was very wrong. I’ll make that more clear.
Thank you for clarifying and changing it in your post!
Of course- it’s more appropriate and pc this way. Thanks for kindly letting me know!
No, it’s really not. It’s not “more appropriate” to make a statement that only overweight people binge. What a way to alienate readers. Good bye Clare.
That was generalization (and one that I think is unfortunately too common in our society) that I was making a point of to show that it was obviously incorrect.
I think Claire tried to put it as kindly & appropriately as possible, and that’s all you can really expect! I can`t imagine how she could have said it nicer, especially since she was simply stating the connotations of the word binge to her.
Reading this blog post it sounds almost like I wrote it myself. I have had a lot of things happen in the past year that have been big emotional drains for me, and ones that have kept my wheels turning in my mind and my self doubts growing. I’ve “soothed” those thoughts with anything to snack on–chocolate chips, cereal, you name it. Anything that’s easy to grab and munch, I would eat it. My husband doesn’t understand. He just tells me, “You’re not hungry, so stop eating. You have will power, use it.” But I don’t believe it’s a matter of will power alone, or if it is, then mine is so minuscule that it doesn’t even put up a fight. Thank you for sharing your struggles. If I could figure out how to put my feelings about my binging into words like you have, I’d write a post on my blog, but I haven’t been able to, not like you have.
Your statement about what your husband says is exactly what my boyfriend says! He just doesn’t understand that it is not that simple sometimes. For example, the other day we had a huge coffee cake laying out and every.single.time I passed it, I grabbed a little bit. I just kept snacking on it because it was there. I asked my bf if I could throw it away and he told me that “if you dont want to eat it, just don’t”. That really stuck with me because for him, it is so normal to just stop eating when you dont want to, but for me, it is something I struggle with. Anyways, I appreciate this post because I definitely fall under that description of using food when I am stressed/worried.
I’m on the same page with you, Megan – I feel like I’m experiencing precisely what Clare is writing about (and thank you, Clare, for sharing – so much, so openly, and so honestly!) I also want to write a post on my blog about these struggles, but I’m just not ready yet.
My husband thinks in very similar terms as your significant others, Megan & Molly. He thinks of food in terms of “fuel” (which it is), and as something he “has to do.” Therefore, he can’t begin to comprehend why I’d feel this urge/desire to consume anything when I’m not physically hungry (especially in large quantities.) Fortunately, he tries to be understanding and is aware that my relationship with food is completely different from his because of a variety of factors, but it’s frustrating nonetheless and doesn’t exactly help with the shame/guilt feelings.
Ahhh! Clare! I love this post. As someone who has struggled with full on standing in the kitchen eating thousands of calories and someone just eating a Snickers because I’m stressed it is the same mindset that causes me to do both. Sure a Snickers is no big deal, but it’s the NEED for it– the moment of soothing that it brings that is the problem. I love the idea of a daily “plunge into oblivion.” I think taking time to decompress is key to being healthy in general.
i have found that since an eating disorder i still find eating to be something of which i’m ashamed. i don’t like eating alone in front of people and i don’t like what i’m eating being observed/ talked about (even lunchtime talk at work with one little comment can set me off). as such, i’ve started to hide eating “bad foods,” going downstairs to make tea while sneaking in some chocolate and sunbutter, for example. so embarrassing! i think owning it and appreciating the food would set this apart from a binge. i like the idea of classifying the urgency of the binge rather than the food consumed. my bit of sunbutter would be normal, but the fact that i’m hiding it, consuming it quickly downstairs= not cool.
another great post- thanks! xx
I’m not sure I agree with this definition of binge. Yes, it absolutely comes along with emotional feelings not just the amount of food you eat…but I think this also leads to restriction, which just becomes a vicious cycle. Instead of considering everything that you eat (you as in everyone, not you personally) which makes you emotionally uncomfortable a binge and therefore an excuse to restrict in the future, you should instead focus on why that food makes you so uncomfortable. What is it about the pita chips, chocolate chips, ice cream, or cereal that makes you feel guilty and out of control. Once you have those feelings under control I think it’s a lot easier to deal with the binge rather than attaching a stigma to a particular food. Just my two cents.
This is really interesting to me. I completely understand Geenen Roth’s definition, but sometimes I think it’s okay to turn to food for comfort, especially if it’s only two cookies. Although, I do suppose it depends on the mindset- those cookies won’t taste good if one is in the “binge” mindset.
So when you say you want to help people with eating disorders, you just meant skinny, ‘normal’, 20-somethings, right? I mean, why would you want to go near crazy obese people?
The post has been changed to be a little more sensitive after someone kindly pointed out that Clare’s original wording was a little offensive. Consider reading all the comments before you lash out.
Clare is not trying to offend anyone – she’s trying to sort through her feelings and express them as best she can so that other people can discuss an important issue with her. Why are you reading this blog if you’re so quick to react in such a negative way?
Clare, I really appreciate this post and I totally agree with this definition of binge. In fact, right before I read it I ate my breakfast in such a stressed mindset – I rushed through it and wasn’t thinking. It wasn’t an unusually large amount of food but the manner in which I ate was spot-on with what you’re describing. I had an “ah-ha!” moment and when I thought about it – I realized that I ate this way because I’m stressed about an upcoming move and career change. This post is a great way to get us all thinking about what we eat instead of just going through the motions.
I was curious if someone would mention this. I sometimes cringe reading the things you write. I thought it had gotten better after a few very inappropriate comments that you were called out on and changed, but then you go ahead and write something offensive again! I get that it was your mindset and you were trying to point out how wrong it was but sometimes just don’t say anything at all. You basically called all obese people crazy and unable to control themselves–may not have been your intention but it could have easily been misinterpreted that way. Hopefully school teaches you a bit about acceptance of those who are different that what you are used to (and how to appropriately write your thoughts without offending 1/2 your readers).
I was definitely trying to point out that my thinking was incorrect and it came off wrong. I’m sorry.
Totally agree with you Lindsey!! If u don’t like her writing, stop reading her blog. Clare’s trying to express her own feelings about something that is difficult for her to share with others who may be going through similar issues. Although her comment may have offended you, did u ever think about how your comments are affecting her? This is her own space she uses as a journal and is sharing her experiences with the world..it’s not like she’s getting graded so it doesn’t have to be perfect. This subject is difficult enough to talk about without having comments to diminish it.
Thank you Clare for a wonder post! I feel like I’m going through the same thing :/
I usually enjoy her blog, that is why I read! I think it’s totally appropriate to bring light to statements that can offend people. While maybe we didn’t deliver the message so kindly (and I do understand what Clare was trying to say), I think bloggers should be aware when their delivery is offensive to many–as this statement was. We can all learn something and I think Clare would rather know what might be offensive and be more aware in the future than just have people “stop reading her blog”. Maybe not, who knows!
I definitely want to be made aware when I’ve overlooked something that hurts others, and appreciate when it is done politely.
I don’t agree with her definition of binge… “But if you are eating two cookies because there is some emotion or situation causing you to NEED the cookies so much so that you eat them without even enjoying them, without even being hungry for them, then it is a binge.” Sorry, that’s not a binge. I think the thought process behind it is akin to a binge eater’s mindset, but to me this instance is an example of EMOTIONAL EATING, not BINGE EATING. They are similar of course, but bingeing to me must include a large quantity of food. That’s just how it is defined. As a former binge-eater, I have had my share of both binges and emotional eating. They are very different to me.
Interesting – I think that I had always viewed it in that same way. I wonder why Roth chose to define those times as a binge?
I agree with this. I think this is combining two different issues. Binge eating is associated with uncontrollable, excessive eating, ingesting large quantities of calories. Two cookies is not a binge.
I think of it like: emotional eating is NOT always binge eating, but binge eating is emotional eating (emotionally rooted).
Also I think the post could have been stronger without the image with the woman and the donuts. Just seems sort of insensitive and ignorant. NOT trying to start anything negative, just giving you my opinion bc i really appreciate these serious topic posts (so much more interesting then WhatIate etc) and I think they will start to set your blog apart.
Interesting point about the image. Thanks.
I’m afraid I cannot agree with Roth’s definition of a ‘binge’ – I have read all of her books and I find both her arguments and philosophies contradictory, flawed and sometimes reductive. But my opinions relating to Roth would mean a comment the length of a short novel, so I shall refrain from mentioning her too regularly.
My main issue with defining two cookies as a binge simply due to the feelings of discomfort, anxiety, etc. surrounding them is that, by the same logic, one could suggest that anyone on a ‘diet gone too far’ has anorexia. There are degrees of binge eating just as there are degrees of restriction, and I do find your definition a little insulting. Two cookies can be emotional eating, yes, but what of the anorectic who may experience equal distress eating an extra apple outside of her allowance when she ‘isn’t hungry’? And what about people like myself, who have BED and at times during their life have eaten to the point of physical pain every single day for months, been unable to concentrate enough to hold down a job, nearly lost their further education and completely lost every friend they ever had? When you’ve been down that rabbit hole as I have, to the point of reducing the family you love more than anything in the world to tears in front of you, physically hurting your severely ill mother because she is coming between you and the food you’re trying to binge on…when you’ve sunk that low; been so utterly consumed by binge eating disorder and compulsive overeating, it is not helpful to see someone as thin, together and successful as you arguing that anyone who feels uneasy eating two handfuls of chocolate chips is ‘bingeing.’
It is hard enough to get taken seriously and receive any kind of help or treatment as it is – it’s ridiculous that in NEDA week there was NOTHING about binge eaters or compulsive overeaters. Two cookies won’t ruin your life (or your figure) – I hesitate to say ‘real’ binge eating because I don’t want to invalidate your feelings, but for want of a better word ‘real’ binge eating ruins your life, relationships AND figure. I’m not one of those obese people you casually mentioned (and the tone of that was somewhat fat-shaming) but I am at the top end of the ‘normal’ BMI so nowhere near as thin as you, and I have been as high as a 25 BMI in the past.
I think it is potentially damaging to define BED as a mindset – it detracts from both people with genuine, life-shattering BED and COE and those with restrictive EDs who may be experiencing reactive eating after years of anorexia. I am no Roth fan so her spurious reasoning doesn’t surprise me…however, I did expect better of you given your medical aspirations and background.
Jess I applaud you for your courageous response.
Clare, how dare you lead vulnerable, recovering bulimics who read your blog to potentially believe that two cookies is a binge? Shame on you.
Martha, we are allowed to disagree. Everyone has different experiences, and for me personally I associate with roth’s definition.
Interesting argument. Always nice to consider two sides.
I don’t agree with the “new” definition. Two cookies is not a binge regardless of the reasons why… many other words could describe it but not binge. It just seems like yet another excuse to feel guilty about eating something and dwell on it instead of directly addressing the issues that cause you to eat food that you don’t really want and/or don’t enjoy. I personally associate the word with eating disorders for overweight AND underweight people because I think it often goes hand and hand with purge.
Agreed. Eating two cookies is not a binge. If you ate them mindlessly it is likely because your body is craving nutrients that have been restricted in the past and they are what you reached for first. However, that’s not anything near the struggle of what binging would truly be. Instead, it furthers the mentality that cookies, sugar, anything not clean and raw is automatically “bad” and you should stay away from it. It seems like the complete opposite of what intuitive eating should be teaching a person.
Reading comments like this are frustrating. I don’t believe Shari and Gabriella have experienced true disordered eating if they can’t relate to this mentality. Binging is absolutely all about the mindset regardless of the quantity of food. There’s a big difference between “I want dessert, let me have these 2 cookies” and then the person moves on with their day, and “Should I have those cookies? Do I deserve them? But I ate 2 cookies two days ago? Do I need them? Am I eating them emotionally? Will this effect my eating later on? Oh screw it I’ll have them” followed by guilt and obsession. Both situations are 2 cookies, one is disordered and one is not. I think you explained it very well Clare.
I actually have had experience with disordered eating, it runs deep in my family and I have experienced many addictions beyond eating first hand. Because of that background I think when you are punishing yourself for eating two cookies it is NOT about binging it is still based in prior anorexic behavior. There is a quantity of food involved in the definition of binging for a reason. Yes, I absolutely think feeling guilty over two cookies is disordered thinking, but no it is not binging to me.
Thanks for clarifying Gabriella. And I definitely apologize for potentially offending you, I shouldn’t have jumped to judgements. I understand a bit better where you’re coming from now.
I guess to conclude, I understand your viewpoint, but I think Clare’s point (and correct me if I’m wrong Clare!) is that she struggles with disordered thoughts and regardless of whether they’re coming from old binge thoughts or anorexic thoughts doesn’t matte so much as it matters that she wants to find a way to accept them and move forward. From my BED experience, dissecting what part of yourself the thoughts come from is not always helpful. Developing tools to cope and help yourself is what has done the most for me personally. Again, everyone is different so I’m not trying to discredit your experience and what has helped you, Gabriella.
Hey Julie!
I actually wasn’t talking about disordered thoughts at all – I was thinking about emotional struggles unrelated to eating that I try to assuage through eating. Just like anorexia was a result of feeling out of control, I now have a new crutch or “solution to lean on – and it is emotional/binge eating. I supposed that could still be considered disordered thought, but for me I don’t see it that way.
Thanks!
Interesting. I think that both anorexia and my emotional/binge eating come from the same place – from feeling a loss of control or some other emotion and using food (or lack of food) as the crutch to fall on. So I don’t consider mine still anorexic behavior, but rather a different form of turning to food. Still an eating issue/disorder variation, but not the same one.
Totally agree. It’s all about the thought pattern. I think the word “binge” can bring up a lot for people who have experienced that deep struggle. It’s definitely a touchy subject just like any eating disorder. I think what it goes to show is that so many people are suffering from disordered thoughts that might not be full blown in the traditional definitions of the eating disorder, but are still so limiting. It’s really sad that so many girls, myself included, constantly feel this struggle with food. And no need to apologize! Like you said, everyone has a very personal, very different experience with their disorders…that’s why these topics can be so touchy, but also shed so much light!
I have to disagree with ’2 cookies is a binge’ the ‘its the mindset’ notion. I agree with the mindset, but if 2 cookies is a binge then whats to stop you from going on to 2 boxes? It leads to an all or nothing mentality. If you’re in a binge mindset and you eat 2 cookies but stop yourself, thats not a binge, its a mistake – lets not turn that mistake into a relapse by adding guilt to it which is unnecessary. If your binge habit is down to 2 cookies you are doing really well. If its down to 1, even better. Working towards quiting altogether is the ultimate goal.
Clare, imagine if I said that because I spenDas couple of days trying to cut down on snacks, I was anorexic? If i wrote on my blog that i thought i had anorexia because i felt a but chubby and chose to snack on an apple and felt a bot deprived, you’d laugh in my face, as soneone who’s survived anorexia. Do you see what i mean?
I do appreciate what you’re trying to say, but I think you need to remember that there’s ‘binging’ as in the ‘crap, I feel blue, oh look, cookies!’ which we all do, and binge eating disorder. Just as there’s a difference between trying to cut out junk and anorexia, or people who feel a bit sad and people who are clinically depressed.
I think that people who identify as having binge eating disorder may find it quite offensive, and minimising of their pain, to have two cookies described as a binge. Two cookies is emotional eating, it’s not a binge. Binging is eating whole days’ worth of calories in one go, eating out of the bin, eating until you feel like you’re going to die, hiding food, spending a week’s pay on donuts, ruining your body with purging, and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.
I appreciate you sharing your experience and I’m not trying to diminish it, i’m just trying to show you the other side of the coin, as it were.
I wish you the very best in getting a handle on your eating issues – I think we can all identify with the struggle in one way or another.
Totally get that. There is definitely a line that I understand on the other side, and while I relate to roth’s definition I do see how it could lead to generalizing and misdiagnosing.
Thanks form pointing that out kindly (and not diminishing my experience). I’d be curious to see how Roth would respond.
Eating issues (and mental health issues in general) are so subjective – I don’t know about you but find this kind of discussion really helpful.
I can relate both to roth’s definition/your experience AND to what others are saying here.
I guess it’s a bit like an anorexic ‘feeling fat’ – while they may not be objectively fat, their feelings are still valid and damaging. In the same way, two cookies might not be objectively a binge, but that doesn’t diminish how YOU feel about it.
Aren’t our own brains funny (and frustrating!) things?
Hey I’ve been thinking a little more a out this. While eating a healthier snack is not anorexia, if you had a restrictive “I can’t have that, I don’t deserve that” then it would be eating disorder-like behavior even if you didn’t have a full blown eating disorder.
I think that is Roth’s point. You may not have binge eating disorder, but are still exhibiting binge-like behavior. Does that make more sense? I’m trying to figure it out too!
Cross post there! And yes, I agree – I think it’s important to acknowledge both the reality of the situation (I.e. two cookies is not a binge, it’s a normal amount) and the lived experience of the individual (I.e. I feel out of control, I ate them because I was sad, etc)
Exactly!
LOVE this! I think this new definition of binging is very important in our society where we tend to use food as a crutch instead of proper nourishment and enjoyment for our bodies. I suffer from binging sometimes – mostly driven by boredom – and this post is going to help me think about my actions next time I reach for something when I am not hungry and emotional.
Clare,
I just wanted to encourage you and tell you how much I identify with you and your current struggles. I have been there myself, and recently wrote on this same thing ( and dealing with the same issues you mentioned dealing with yesterday), in a blog post on my blog this week. I hope you’ll get a chance to read it. We are so much alike. You can do this!:) I have been where you are and come out of it. Be strong and listen to yourself. Be kinder to yourself! You can do this!
Thanks heather!!
It was tough and a little hurtful to read that you used to think that only “sick, overweight” people binged, but my opinion changed when you went on to explained your new perspective.
I am 5’4″, 155 lbs, which is most certainly overweight but not obese by any means. I’ve struggled with binge eating (well all my life) but severely disordered for the past 3 years. I have made up for it with exercise and periods of extremely clean eating so that I could stay a normal weight. To the average passerby, I am normal, but I know inside my head that my thinking can get disordered (when I’m eating even healthy things, in a rushed, hurried, emotional, gotta-have-it way). I also translate my disordered thinking into exercise sometimes; “gotta work out because I ate a brownie last night” or “gotta work out so I don’t lose my progress”.
So yes, I agree with your new definition. Binge is definitely one of those words that gets tossed around and most people don’t know the disordered meaning of the word. I’m happy you put it out there. It’s also wonderful to hear you so open and honest! I’m enjoying relating to you through your posts. As always, I hope you aren’t putting all this out there because you feel like you owe it to your readers. Above all else, protect yourself. If you’re still in a vulnerable place, feedback can be so hurtful (a big reason why I deleted my binge eating recovery blog!).
I’m off to cozy up with geneen roth and some tea! Thanks for the inspiration : )
Hey!
Truly didn’t mean it to be offensive, but I think i was coming from a similiar place as you. Outwardly I don’t appear as a “typical” person you would see with binge eating disorder, and so I ignored or trivialized my behavior or feelings. However inwardly I definitely wasn’t coming from a healthy place.
Thanks for the comment!
Clare
Again, thanks for your honesty. I have completely related to all your recent posts about struggling with food. I know it’s hard to be open and vulnerable to criticism, but I truly appreciate knowing someone else experiences the same things. My relationship with food is changing the more aware I become of my habits and emotions. I’m slowly learning to listen to my body and evaluate whether I’m hungry, bored, or in emotional distress. And when I am tempted by cookie cake (last night!), I ask myself if a piece will satisfy me. I knew it wouldn’t. I knew one piece would just make me want another, so I walked away.
The one thing that I think should be mentioned that was not brought up is that many underweight people claim overeating or binge eating. I think there is such a stigma and overuse of the word when females and males fall into that category. I think there is such an overuse of this in just normal society because guilt now runs so deep around food. But it still makes me cringe when I read people who clearly are not fueling their body, ‘saving’ calories, or who are underweight claim they emotionally ate some nights. Your body is starving, that is why you felt the need to eat. I know a lot of your readers are in this category so I just wanted to point that out, it is a good distinction to make.
Very good point – i agree that some people don’t use the term correctly. However, even if someone was underweight, that doesn’t change that they could have had some emotional that was causing them to eat. YES they need the fuel, but it’s hard to say what their mindset and feelings were.
Another lesson that everyone has different experiences!
Great post Clare! I think this is so hard for people to define, and people take this word really lightly in the blog world. A binge is completely different from simply eating a little too much because you’re out with friends, it’s so much more emotional than that. I totally relate to this struggle, because before I developed anorexia, I was in a major binge/purge cycle. You’re doing amazing so far!
Ahh wow, usually don’t read other comments but I did read these and I’m floored that people are offended by what you wrote. I struggled first with anorexia and bulimia then for years with binge eating disorder. I was never obese but I thoroghly understand binging in all it’s glory. I understood everything you said perfectly and didn’t find anything remotely offensive. Geneen’s point about how two cookies can be a binge was simply to make the point that binging isn’t ABOUT food, it’s about your mind and other things in your life. People above were taking it way too literally. Anyway, we are all different and binges can look differently to different people though I do think some (who haven’t actually experienced true binge eating disorder) may not understand. Either way, it’s a mental issue and whether you have binge eating or severe emotional eating, it’s a problem to try and overcome. Thanks for sharing. (longest comment ever, sorry!)
To all the commentors above: I will eat your two extra cookies!
I had to, Clare. <3 you
<3
Wow yeah that is definitely a different way to think about the word “binge”. IT really is all aboiut the mindset. It’s definitely something I am struggling with. I can relate with you when you just had those two bowls of chocolate chips, bowl to mouth – yes, been there, done that. Many times before. And I’m not necessarily overweight either but I have binged more than I can count. It’s not about weight. It’s about how you feel and your mindset.
I can relate to this so well. You know that, though. I agree that it is more about the mindset and the lack of control around the food and the decisions going into eating. Great post!
I think that how I’ve had to learn to view it (through my history with anorexia & bulimia as well as working with at least half a dozen nutritionists) is the difference between SUBJECTIVE and OBJECTIVE bingeing. At times , I have felt that eating an extra apple or bowl of cereal was as stressful/guilt-inducing as a full on binge where I have eaten everything in the pantry. Though the two cookies example that everyone is throwing around can cause a lot of stress, and can SUBJECTIVELY FEEL like a binge, it is not, in fact an OBJECTIVE BINGE.
Love that distinction. Thanks !
Hi – what are Geneen’s qualifications? I went to her website and briefly looked at her about section and didn’t see any references to formal education or experience in a clinical setting.
good question! Not sure aside from pure experience – which isn’t to be looked down upon but certainly is interesting if she’s made a career out of this without formal education in the area.
One thing that you’re totally ignoring (which seems pretty surprising to me given your recent announcement of planning on going into medicine) is that the DSM-IV has some pretty clear definitions of “binge-eating” (most notably, sections 1a and 1b):
DSM-IV Diagnostic Criteria
1. Recurrent episodes of binge eating characterized by BOTH of the following:
a. Eating in a discrete amount of time (within a 2 hour period), an amount that is definitely larger than most people would eat during a similar time period.
b. Sense of lack of control over eating during an episode.
2. Binge eating episodes are associated with three (or more) of the following:
a. Eating much more rapidly than normal.
b. Eating until uncomfortably full.
c. Eating large amounts of food when not hungry.
d. Eating alone because of being embarrassed by how much one is eating.
e. Feeling disgust with oneself, depressed, or guilty after overeating.
3. Marked distress regarding binge eating is present.
4. The binge eating occurs, on average, at least 2 days a week for 6 months.
5. The binge eating is not associated with the regular use of inappropriate compensatory behaviors (e.g. purging, fasting, compulsive exercising).
Do you have any thoughts on this?
Yep – those are the current clinical definitions of binge eating disorder and (while generalized, as most medical definitions are) I bet they are mostly accurate. I wasn’t referring to myself as having binge eating disorder, but rather roth’s definition of a “binge” (not the disorder) applies to me sometimes. ANd lots of those same characteristics apply to roth’s definition of a binge episode.
I know they are releasing new guidelines that will change the definition of anorexia this year, and I wonder if those will change to? I don’t know of a reason they would, just curious.
Eating disorder changes in the upcoming DSM-V can be found here:
http://bodymatters.com.au/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/DSM-VproposalsED.pdf
Thx!
Hi, One thing that you haven’t touched on is that most psychologists and psychiatrists see binge eating develop with anorexics going through recovery. I was severely anorexic for four years and then developed BED and within 8 months had gained almost 80 pounds. I would starve myself all day (same as I would with anorexia), and then binge at night because I was depriving myself all day long. I go to a very large respected academic eating disorder clinic and have been told that I’m not alone and that this happens with most patients eventually and is seen as a good sign. They see it as a “Pendulum Effect” with anorexia on one side and BED on another. Then after this happens, the real work begins in figuring out why a individually personally restricts. (Which leads to their binging. This also offers insight into the real reasons behind their anorexia). To me, Roth is wrong. Binging is a direct result of restricting. Maybe not drastically restricting for every individual, but ones body is in desperation of something and responding.
To cure BED, one actually needs to change the way they eat and think and that doesn’t mean more restriction. The way one thinks can be helped with extensive therapy. It really is insightful and different for every individual patient. Also, medication may be recommended too. Eating healthy protein packed (carbs and fats too) meals all day long to avoid depervation is key to combat BED. Also BED patients need to allow themselves to know what normal eating is and no food should be “off limits”.
It’s okay to have desserts, beer, and cookies, just not binge on them. Two cookies and handfuls on M&Ms are not a binge- maybe just some individuals have disordered thinking regarding that-but that is not binging. No one has to be “perfect” and perfect for me is eating like a normal human being. After combating both the anorexia and BED, that is all I want.
Absolutely! I actually previously struggled with emotional borderline binge eating after recovering from anorexia (read My Story to know more of that) and this is definitely still part of a previous ED manifesting itself differently.
I think it’s SUPER important to get to the emotions behind the behavior (therapists = brilliant for that)
Good comment!
I just want to chime in and say that the same exact thing happened to me. But, even after finding myself back in the “center of the pendelum”, emotional eating/binging still reared it’s ugly head at times. Even when I wasn’t restricting. I definitely thing there’s a correlation but it’s DEFINITELY not the only cause of binging. Just my two cents!
I’m just wondering how you don’t view emotional eating as disordered? (re: one of your responses to a comment – I’d answer there but it’s a busy thread). To me, engaging in emotional eating/binge eating (whatever we’ve decided to call it) is an obvious sign that an imperfect relationship with food exists – that a person is not fully in control of their thinking/actions with food.
I think to admit it is disordered would make it more genuine. Who here reading hasn’t had disordered thoughts about food? People in the “healthy living world”, I would say, have at one point thought too much about what they were eating or had some sort of rules or diet or emotional struggle, readers included. I would say it’s more of the rule rather than the expectation.
I just don’t see the point in saying you’re having these struggles, but no disordered thoughts. How does that add up? This is not an attack or me calling you out, but just wondering how you expect to get a handle on this if you don’t see it as disordered? CBT sounds like something that would be beneficial, but not if you don’t think your thinking is affected (just your behaviour)? I just don’t understand.
I don’t know. I appreciate the post and your honesty, but I am not sure how we can pretend it isn’t disordered.
I absolutely think it is disordered. I never meant to suggest it wasn’t. I don’t have a healthy relationship with food right now but I am working on it.
Okay. I’m just referring to this:
“I actually wasn’t talking about disordered thoughts at all – I was thinking about emotional struggles unrelated to eating that I try to assuage through eating. ”
I’m not mad at the inconsistency or think you are trying to lie to your readers or anything like that. I guess I just want you to be able to deal with whatever is going on – the mixed messages just make me worried that maybe you don’t have a clear grasp right now or are in some sort of denial. There is nothing WRONG with disordered thinking (well, wrong is bad word, I just mean maybe nothing shameful) – you can still be a good person, go to med school, help others, and so on. You don’t choose to have unhealthy thoughts, it’s not the individual’s fault – but to overcome them you need to recognize them. I’m worried maybe you’re not there yet. I think you’re too worried about semantics and finding a way to admit you’re struggling without fully admitting maybe it’s worse than just “emotional eating”. I have never had an ED, I can only imagine how scary it would be to admit some tendencies are resurfacing. But I worry about your success if you can’t be fully honest with yourself (forget the readers).
I think we are all struggling with semantics here. When I said disordered thoughts, I was thinking of thoughts around eating like “I’m too fat, I don’t deserve food” type thoughts…I thought that’s what she was referring to. Those are NOT what comes up during emotional eating or binging for me…my emotions that cause eating are completely unrelated to food.
I think it’s just hard to use words over a computer to accurately describe it when everyone defines things and experiences things differently.But to me, talking about emotionally eating was 100% coming to terms that I don’t eat normally.
Thanks for the answer. I do agree this has gone way off the point and too far into semantics. I also understand this is a public forum for you – so being able to discuss any of this must be a struggle, especially when you are immediately faced with criticism. Good for you for dealing with this and for trying to be honest in the process.
Thanks
Thanks for letting my comment through Clare! You still don’t seem to see the problem in distancing yourself from the “typical” binge eater (which you evidently define as “crazy, obese people”). You would think that someone who is so passionate about eating disorders would have the good sense to realize that disordered eating comes in all different shapes and sizes… I’d also expect someone like you to have a greater understanding that shaming those with disorders (especially by assigning character traits to physical appearance– which is super common in patients with eating disorders) only makes the situation, and the reasons for which the disordered person binges, restricts, or purges, that much worse.
Haha funny! In all the ED docs I’ve seen, they’ve only shown thin women binge!
Interesting – I’ve never seen one like that!
I see binging as a symptom of a larger problem, but also a problem in itself. For myself, my binging behavior affected all other parts of my life. Binging the night before reducing my concentration in classes the next day and affected my mood the next day. I think that my restrictive eating was from a need for control given the uncertainty in the rest of my life. Binging was the behavior that resulting from not physically being able to control and restrict anymore.
So for me, binging stemmed completely and totally from my anorexia. I don’t think it is a symptom of an underlying issue.
When I stopped restricting and ate intuitively, the binging stopped. I no longer have a STRONG compulsion to eat. I no longer obssess over food for every moment of every day.
I hope I can get there too!
This is such a great post. I, too, have always distanced myself from “bingeing.” As a dietetics student, I have always been taught that a binge is thousands of Calories and symptomatic of compulsive over-eating. But it’s so NOT. It’s about the mindset, not the number of Calories consumed. Just last week, I was stressed about a job decision while I was at home, and I wolfed down several handfuls of peanut butter cheerios. Not because I was hungry but because I needed something at that moment. Emotional eating for sure.
Anyway, this is just to say that this post really resonated with me. Thanks.
Thanks!! I think what you call it can be hotly debated, but recognizing the mindset is important.
The definition makes sense, but I don’t know if I am ready to think of emotional eating in that way yet. On the odd occasion that I have binged, I feel so ashamed with the situation and the word that I just want to crawl into bed and get as far away from it as possible. If every time I eat for emotional reasons, no matter how small an amount, I call it a binge, I am afraid I will just feel horrible about myself and get depressed. I really liked the post, but I am going to have to think more deeply about what it means to me.
Hey Clare, I just wanted to say that although I’m on team “two cookies is not a binge,” I’m impressed with the way you’re handling disagreement in the comments – and not only allowing those comments to stand, but participating in the discussion.
I second this! I think you have handled these comments with grace, even when there is disagreements!
Thank you!
I have read your post and the comments and know it’s a lot coming at once, but I wanted to just share my concerns/comments about this as someone recovering from binge eating disorder (BED) and being one of those (from the outside) “crazy, obese people.” I know you edited this part, but that’s neither here nor there as this is what many people think is characteristic of binge eaters. Not all obese people are binge eaters, and *gasp* some obese people are “functioning and fit,” even though not thin.
I think the word “binge” can get thrown around lightly. I know people who swear up and down how awesome Roth is, and that’s fine and dandy. But these assessments of 2 cookies being a binge and your bowl of chocolates being a binge because they were eaten during a time of emotional duress just seems off to me. Perhaps it’s overeating for emotional reasons, and people do that day in and day out. But to say “binge” with regards to these really diminishes the severity of Binge Eating Disorder. People use the word “binge” with far too much casualty. A binge for someone with BED (as one of your commenters outlined with the new DSM-IV definition) is consuming mass quantities of food in a short period of time, usually in secret, with massive amounts of despair, guilt, and shame associated with each bite. The quantity of food puts your mind into a haze, and your body aches in a way that goes beyond an over-expanded stomach and heartburn. You perspire and breathe heavy and wonder how in the world your body can process what you’ve done to it. The pain you were trying to relieve in the first place is replaced with disgust and the entire cycle starts again as soon as enough time has passed where you’ve blocked out the pain you experienced. This could be hours, days, or weeks.
The “binge” in binge eating disorder is really a terrifying, incredibly destructive behavior, just as a single-time purging is for someone who might not necessarily be characterized as bulimic. While emotional eating is definitely a struggle for many people, I really want to throw caution out for people who use “binge” in its place.
Hope this doesn’t come off as negative. I just wanted to share my opinion as someone who has struggled for people to understand BED and the severity of the “binging” act.
No I totally get that, and completely understand that using it lightly like that could diminish a really terrible problem.
I supposed roth’s difference was between a singular binge episode and the whole disorder…that you could have a binge while not having the severity of binge eating disorder.
However i too am questioning this after all of the comments! I would say it is more “binge-like behavior” perhaps? Because truly a lot of that mindset and the characteristics you described are still there, even if the amount of food is different. I think it really varies for each person.
What does that first image add to your post? I know what it says to me but I want to know what your mindset was behind using it. I googled “binge” myself and three other images came up before that one.
I know that’s nit-picky and I’m really not trying to be rude or mean because you seem like a thoughtful person, but that image is off-putting given the message you’re trying to convey.
I thought it reinforced the incorrect stigma that many people have that binge eaters and all overweight and eating junk food, which is not true.
Great post Claire – based on these definitions I am definitely a binge eater. I call it “emotional eating” more often though on my blog because, like you, I feel like “binge” is such a harsh term – I’m not shoving down a pint of ice cream and a box of donuts! But it’s not what you eat or how much you eat (which I’ve tried to explain to my readers) but your mentality. Thanks for sharing!
Hi Clare!
Wow- so much to say from this post. First of all, I really appreciate your honesty and feel that you don’t have to apologize for what you say. It’s your blog and you are being very honest and open despite realizing that not everyone will agree with your perspective.
I do agree with the commenters that not all overweight people are sick, not all thin people are fit, and not all thin people are functioning.
I think I kind of get where you’re coming from. Let me explain. I am really short and have a small frame so I have a very tiny, petite look even if my weight fluctuates. I have a health problem (having nothing to do with binge eating) which is usually associated with larger and more overweight women, simply because the majority of people who have it fit that profile.
I feel extremely awkward talking about this problem both to doctors and to friends/family because I don’t fit the usual profile of someone who has it. Most people don’t take my concerns seriously, which frustrates me and makes me reluctant to talk about it. (I apologize for being vague).
Is this how you felt when opening up about the binge eating? That people wouldn’t take you seriously because you are thin and fit?
I think everyone can have their own personal definition of what a binge is to them. For me, my definition of a binge is any time I eat and feel uncomfortably full or unenergized afterward. That means that I’m not eating to satisfy hunger, but for emotional reasons or for pleasure. I don’t think two cookies is a binge, because that wouldn’t make me uncomfortably full. However, that’s just my personal definition and doesn’t have to apply to everyone.
I really appreciate your honesty.
Exactly how I felt, thanks. Often I’m not taken seriously because I am at a healthy weight.
I have to agree with you on your definition of a binge. It makes sense that if the reason you are eating something is driven by your emotions, that that would be a binge. Binging is not something that only overweight people do. I’m surprised that anyone would think that, or not take you seriously because you aren’t.
Binging is binging. It’s binging whether or not you purge (former bulimic’s opinion).
I really enjoyed reading your blog and I think it is great at working through your food issues and feelings. I am also a binge eater and have been for the past 20 years or so. The ideas that you have about binges being a symptom I totally agree with and that is how I try to look at them now. I struggled for many years and I haven’t had treatment for it because I am a guy. I got fobbed off with lots of excuses before treatment was suggested and even then it didn’t do much good at the time (this was about 12 years ago). Unfortunately I have had a bit of a relapse in the past couple of months so I have asked for treatment again but reading your blog has helped me to figure through things in my own head. Thank you and please keep writing.